I'm trying to get my kids to love the outside as much as me. I feel like it is such a part of who I am- of who I want to be. I make them ride their bikes, or walk and play outdoors whenever possible. I feel like its those connections to the natural world that opens their eyes to so much possibility.
I've been obsessed with home improvement lately. I go in phases I guess and it has been a while since I've tackled one. I just got done hanging all the pictures and frames that have been sitting on the floor gathering dust waiting for Joe to come help hang. He just doesn't have the time. I know this but still wait for him. I love the improvements though. We are getting ready to have a backsplash installed that isn't going to be cheap and the buyers remorse and just plain guilt for being so "worldly" are eating away at me. Yet instead of trying to make myself feel better by doing things for others, I am trying so hard to suppress the urge to go buy this adorable yellow bench I saw at Target yesterday. It says in the church written handbook about managing money that you should upgrade and improve your house so I don't know why it's making me nervous. I guess cause I feel happy, content, and incredible blessed that I feel guilty and bad for all those who are not feeling this. All those who struggle, and skimp and save and still will never have even close to all I do.
I saw this girl that used to be in my ward yesterday. She was the primary president when I first moved in and I never felt like she liked me very much, for whatever reason. I'm sure she doesn't feel that way but I just never thought she was very friendly. Well I was really excited to see her yesterday because I thought now that I am President, we would have this unspoken bond and I might not feel that dislike from her. However, after the polite, and slightly forced small talk from her, she couldn't have walked away fast enough. I felt bad. I hope I never give anyone that impression. I love Joe's mantra this year which is that every interaction I have with someone else should only leave them feeing good about themselves. I should only uplift and make others feel better than they did before interacting with me. I am recommitting to this mentality no matter how the other person is being.
